Spoiler Cry, Even Better if you Beg

marahya · Apr 24, 2021

Yahiro said: ↑

Thank you so much for writing the whole story. But can i ask from where did you read it? Because I have searched a lot but there are only 21 chapters translated everywhere
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there was a mtl for this before it taken down..im so regret i didnt read it

Yahiro · Apr 24, 2021

marahya said: ↑

there was a mtl for this before it taken down..im so regret i didnt read it
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I saw in the comments that someone mentioned that this novel is completely translated in a page named mtlcorner.....I even saw the novel in that page with the "finished" tag.....but I can't open any novel link in that page. They show that they' re updating their page and that's why all the links are currently unavailable. I don't know if that page is gonna get fixed or if it's a temporary situation......but if anyone knows any free links to read this novel(in English) please do tell.

minibeth · Apr 24, 2021

mtlcorners have a problem with their server so sometimes it's down and you can't visit it. It was mention in their discord group.

I actually copy paste the whole mtl version of this just for personal offline reading lol. Even though I have a hard time comprehending the MTL. This is one of the great stories that I have read in a while.

And the roller coaster ride of feels in this novel is a lot.

I hated Matthius at the start also but after the story is going at the end. Matthius become soft and really love her for real. He even plan to give up being the duke if her mother and grandma will not accept our FL. But in the end they agree with Matthius decision. And the two mothers even pamper their grandson too much lol.

And Claudine is quite a pitiful side character especially when she realize her feelings to Riel. She didn't even said I love you to him.

The side stories is way too perfect for me that I love it so much lol.

Fayfay · Apr 24, 2021

minibeth said: ↑

mtlcorners have a problem with their server so sometimes it's down and you can't visit it. It was mention in their discord group.

I actually copy paste the whole mtl version of this just for personal offline reading lol. Even though I have a hard time comprehending the MTL. This is one of the great stories that I have read in a while.

And the roller coaster ride of feels in this novel is a lot.

I hated Matthius at the start also but after the story is going at the end. Matthius become soft and really love her for real. He even plan to give up being the duke if her mother and grandma will not accept our FL. But in the end they agree with Matthius decision. And the two mothers even pamper their grandson too much lol.

And Claudine is quite a pitiful side character especially when she realize her feelings to Riel. She didn't even said I love you to him.

The side stories is way too perfect for me that I love it so much lol.
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Did you compile the whole mtl into one file? If you did, I would like one please, hehe.

I want to re-read it again but the site went down.

Yahiro · Apr 24, 2021

minibeth said: ↑

mtlcorners have a problem with their server so sometimes it's down and you can't visit it. It was mention in their discord group.

I actually copy paste the whole mtl version of this just for personal offline reading lol. Even though I have a hard time comprehending the MTL. This is one of the great stories that I have read in a while.

And the roller coaster ride of feels in this novel is a lot.

I hated Matthius at the start also but after the story is going at the end. Matthius become soft and really love her for real. He even plan to give up being the duke if her mother and grandma will not accept our FL. But in the end they agree with Matthius decision. And the two mothers even pamper their grandson too much lol.

And Claudine is quite a pitiful side character especially when she realize her feelings to Riel. She didn't even said I love you to him.

The side stories is way too perfect for me that I love it so much lol.
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When that page is not down.....at that time can I find this whole story there??

Fayfay said: ↑

Did you compile the whole mtl into one file? If you did, I would like one please, hehe.

I want to re-read it again but the site went down.
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Me too!! I would also like to read it. But is that be possible? Or will it be too much hassle for you? Can you just copy paste the whole story here or make a pdf file?

minibeth · Apr 25, 2021

Yahiro said: ↑

When that page is not down.....at that time can I find this whole story there??
I will try to save it in doc but it will take awhile due I copy paste it in a writing app every single chapters lol.

Me too!! I would also like to read it. But is that be possible? Or will it be too much hassle for you? Can you just copy paste the whole story here or make a pdf file?
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I will try to save it in doc but it will take for awhile due I copy paste it in an app lol.

Actually when its up you can read the full story there. I even copy paste a lot because their MTL's are really high quality.

Yahiro · Apr 25, 2021

minibeth said: ↑

I will try to save it in doc but it will take for awhile due I copy paste it in an app lol.

Actually when its up you can read the full story there. I even copy paste a lot because their MTL's are really high quality.
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You mean in mtlcorner? Okay then! I'll keep checking their website. Did they say any definite time like when might their their server be fixed again?

P.s. I started reading webnovels recently and I really love how friendly and helpful this whole community is!

minibeth · Apr 27, 2021

Yahiro said: ↑

You mean in mtlcorner? Okay then! I'll keep checking their website. Did they say any definite time like when might their their server be fixed again?

P.s. I started reading webnovels recently and I really love how friendly and helpful this whole community is!
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Yes in MTLcorner, its already finished there including the side stories.

They always advise in their discord if their page is up. They are having a problem with their page due to the storage capacity bcoz they dont have enough funds to purchase much higher storage in their website. Thats the reason their site is always down.

PS I know theres a lot of nice people here. We are just being careful to share some sites that are sharing translation and MTL's due to hunting of some authors and super crazy loyal fans lol.

cometothedarkside97 · Jul 24, 2021

Hmm spicy~

hahahatdog · Aug 1, 2021

Thank you all for the spoilers. I love this story so much. I love how the characters seems like realistic.

Still, I cannot accept how uncle bill died

and honestly, kyle deserves more to be with mc than mat. But i am used to it... we have a lot of 2nd ml that deserves the mc more than the ml lol

jahjah33 · Aug 13, 2021

Isekaifan13wen said: ↑

I have a copy from mtl corner(before they deleted all of it)
If you want you can message me.
I find a way to share it for you
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Hi... Made a dm.... But will send a new one later to correct my email...

llaladeriver · Aug 19, 2021

comeetomama said: ↑

i am fucking mad. I wanna kidnap author and show her that her novel is shit. Matt is a pysco a fucking abuser. He should suffer. He is literaly trash. Just because his life was perfect doesnt mean that he can make her suffer. She had dreams. She wanted to go to uni and became a teacher. But he got in way. I am sick of this. I want to punch something or someone. Fuck this shit. Thıs fucking crazy authors empoisoning the young brains.
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oml really? I haven't read the novel yet but from the title, novel cover and synopsis, I know that the ML would be the typical bast**d a****le who controls over everything, and the FL won't have any choice but to be in a toxic relationship with the ML.

This is so sad; I might be biased because I'm an education-oriented person, but regardless, it's such a shame that she sacrificed her dream for the ML

Rokai · Aug 20, 2021

This novel satisfied my yandere genre craving like damn. Usually, I find such yandere-ness in some Chinese novels. Thank you so much for all the lovely spoilers! I feel I'ma come back to just reread all of them.

april12 · Aug 21, 2021

jahjah33 said: ↑

Hi... Made a dm.... But will send a new one later to correct my email...
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Hi,did you get the novel?

dinocreature · Aug 31, 2021

hey, guys! anyone who knows where i can read the whole story? i’m gonna cry just reading the spoilers. badly want to read it ☹︎ ♡

Silverriver · Sep 24, 2021

please, anyone who had this mtl file, or raws, or anything. I miss this novel so much I really want to read it again ( I've read it on mtlcorner a few month ago, but they deleted it already

Tsukii_Satoru · Sep 25, 2021

Marcie said: ↑

-EPILOGUE-

The wedding was to be held soon. Of course, the nobles' opinions were divided. They thought it was a betrayal and an insult when the duke decided to marry an orphan commoner, while having a child with her too. They said they wouldn't even go to the wedding to show their opposition, but it was later announced that the duke's family would only select a few to invite (awww yall weren't invited in the first place )

The couple was staying in Ratz but had returned to Arbis for their wedding. Leila recalled when Matthias first appeared, she cried when she first saw the scars on the his body, he watched her quietly and said "Do not cry. What you like is fine." as he pointed to his face so Leila hit his chest with her clenched fists.

Leila realized how different the duke's world was. She had to walk, think, speak and act differently. On their first night in Arbis, she was in the duchess room and was feeling like the portraits of the past women were watching her. She suddenly heard a sound and saw the duke. There was a door that adjoined their rooms. His family said even though they will do their marriage after childbirth, they still had to follow etiquette and sleep in separate rooms. Leila recalled how both she and Matthias agreed to them, but of course Matthias wasn't having that. He always left before light came. Leila told him she was scared and he was like what, and Leila said her worries but Matthias assured her he won't let that happen.

The duke's mother and grandmother quickly fell in love with Felix because of his resemble to their duke but was bright and smiled. They even agreed to Matthias moving to the Ratz so long as Felix would spend one season per year in Arbis.

The duke's mom warned Matthias. Matthias knew no matter how hard Leila tries, she will never be accepted by the noble ladies. So rather than be rejected, reject first. With nobles opposing, the family name might lose power but Matthias planned to make the family name more successful.

The wedding was held in the garden on a sunny day. The scent of flowers were in the air. The nobles waited for the invitation to Leila's debut, but it didn't come. Much to their surprise, rather than a honeymoon, Leila and him planned to live in Ratz to because she was going to college by the fall there. The nobles thought the duke was a crazy man for his wife.

Leila's class today ended early. There were still stares from her on campus, but she was fine it with. She had planned to meet Felix by the fountain with the nanny, but was surprised to see Matthias was there too. The duke said the meeting ended early. Leila knew he had been busy since autumn. Leila asked him if he would also go with them, and she said she'd buy him ice cream. Matthias was holding Felix and wrapped his hand around Leila's.

Claudine visited Riet's grave and confessed her love to him, then she said goodbye. She was engaged to someone else now.

The couple and their child were walking in the park. The duke's servant felt dissented knowing what Matthias had done this morning. The rebellion and insults of nobles were great, but they obviously couldn't say that to the duke's face. So they attacked his weakness: which was Leila. Count Stein took the lead in insulting Leila, and then he went bankrupt. The Count's tobacco company that supported other businesses collapsed, which was actually the agenda of today's meeting. Taking a bite of Leila's ice cream, it didn't seem like Matthias was a cruel man.

They settled under a shade of a tree, and he said he was tired. Leila asked him what he did today, and the duke said just something. Matthias recalled how Count Stein openly reproached Leila and his child at a party. So while they were in the cigar room, he directly threatened the Count's business. All nobles heard about it.

Matthias opened his eyes and saw Leila was looking at him. He said he felt sick and Leila told him to sleep a little, and gave his cheek a gentle touch. His tenderhearted wife became endlessly friendly when he looked sick, so he knew how to use it properly. Sometimes, even the scars on his body felt quite useful. He also liked it when Leila was in pain and didn't know what to do so she just kissed his wounds (this crazy sicko ). Also when they were in the social circle, and she was always worrying and asking how to say hello. At that time, it seemed like it was only Leila's world. And he loved that world.

He saw Felix clinging to Leila's neck after he fell down while running around in the park, and he thought how it was unrealistic to know the child was the one he had wanted to kill. But Matthias quickly fell in love with Felix the moment Felix laughed and he saw Leila's resemblance to Felix.

Leila said she'll make something delicious tonight. Even though Leila was a duchess, she was often in the kitchen. Matthias hated to keep Leila in the name of the duchess, as she was struggling to play the role, wear clothes that don't fit and be under pressure. Leila was the woman who had returned to him even though he sent her away, that forgave him, and loved him. So he wanted to be her sky, where she could be the freest and most beautiful. And he loved the heavenly Leila.

On the way home from the carriage, she remembered how they were going to attend at the imperial palace. He told Leila not to worry anymore, as everyone will be kind. Leila seldom talked to him about the challenges she was facing because he knew she was too proud for that. Even though Leila could endure it, he can't. He was serious to say that it didn't matter if the world wasn't changing, but if Leila got hurt, the story will change. He intended to change it. Matthias got out of the carriage, holding Felix who fell asleep.

After the imperial party, they were on their way home inside the carriage. Leila wondered if the duke's consolation was a reality. The empress' birthday was easier than expected. Rather than being ignored and treated indifferently, there was enough kindness to chat to her with simple words. She asked Matthias if he knew something and how he told her everyone will be kind. Matthias replied and laughed as if he just remembered it. He said it was just common encouragement and she was asking if it really was and she was being suspicious of his grime attitude.

Spring came. On the weekend, the two planned a trip alone with Felix left to the care of his grandparent and great-grandparent. The duke's mom was staring at Leila and told Matthias how she never thought he'd be so stingy towards his wife. Leila was always wearing the same necklace, and Matthias replied it was because he chose it himself. Later, Leila thanked him for covering it up, as the necklace was from uncle Bill and it was precious to her, Matthias just smiled. (technically, it was from him. dude still batshi*t crazy hahahaha)

Near the end of their wedding, Matthias said he'll be Leila's sky. So she can fly to hear heart's content, anything is fine if you don't leave me. Then he said he loves her. Leila learned that night after the reception what he meant. That they were moving to Ratz, and that she was going to college. Leila asked him how he got her into college and he said he would do anything for Leila. His dogma that decided everything without consolation was embarrassing but Leila knew his heart. That it was love, and his heart just wanted to re-attach the wings he broke. Of course, it was still astonishing to think he used their child as a transaction. But now, Matthias loved Felix so much it was overwhelming if he was a father who hated his child. Leila could now look at him without hatred.

As they were walking along the park while on their trip, Matthias looked at Leila deeply. It was the image of the woman who he wanted to have even if he took her, but he could never have her and it drove him crazy. The same woman he had destroyed, engulfed in distorted desires. Now he has this woman in full.

Leila asked him if he wanted something, because he's given her a lot. He said no. He thought the only longing he had in his life was Leila. Leila said she's the only one too greedy, but Matthias said she can do that. In any amount.

Then she asked if he wanted a daughter who looked like her. He looked at Leila with an interesting look as he imagined a child resembling her. He was curious to Leila's childhood that he couldn't see, he wanted to pour love to that lonely child. But he said "I have you". I already have you. Leila thought it was a strange answer, but she took it as a sweet confession. She told him to hold out his hand, and the two entangled their fingers. Leila talked more than usual and Matthias laughed more than usual. It was ordinary, but so special. It was a spring of lovers who will love so much, for a long time.

-SIDE STORIES-

Leila was studying late at night for her exams, the duke came in. He started to tease her and Leila closed her eyes in anticipation of a kiss but he suddenly left the room saying she should said study hard.

She had high marks for the exam, she hopped on to her bike to go home as soon as possible. Most still stated at the duchess riding a bicycle. Even nobles found it unusual, expect for Matthias who gave her the bike. Leila liked using the bike more than the car, because it was easier and faster to go to school. She went home and found her son and Matthias having a talk at the garden. There were was laughter in the family of three as she announced her exam results.

They were visiting Arbis, and the duke got out of the car. He never allows anyone else to escort Leila, while the servants at estate are surprised and never expected that the adopted child from the hut would be the duchess. They saw how Matthias looked cold and when Leila causally says something about the weather, there was a hint of softness they noticed. Leila found her old cottage, most of her belongings was moved to Ratz and only cleaned furniture remained. Matthias gave Leila rights to the place and she decided to use it in a way that would make uncle Bill proud. She sat in the front porch and told uncle Bill about her daily life, then she left saying she'll come back again. "I love you, father"

The family had a picnic and Matthias dismissed the servants, so it was only the three of them. He suddenly said "Take it off Leila" so she immediately covered her son's ears and asked him how he could say it with Felix right here and in broad daylight.

He took off her hat and asked what she was talking about , and she said he hasn't changed and that he's still a crow.

They gave the sleeping Felix to the nanny but Matthias said he and Leila will walk, so the car went on ahead.

They explored the garden and Matthias said Felix would get tired and Leila was surprised, telling him she didn't know he loved Felix, and Matthias said of course he did, it was a child that came from her.

Leila suggest to climb on a tree and he agrees, they sit on a branch and Matthias hugs her from behind as they talk when he suddenly kissed her. After that, he wiped her lips with his handkerchief and said he'll teach her how to swim, because he promised to.

The duke's grandmother invited Leila to go with her to a party. Felix was coming too. But before Leila could answer, Matthias said he already had a something to do with her.

He taught Leila to swim by the lake, and at first she was afraid because it reminded her of her childhood where her aunt forced her on a lake. But Matthias was there, so Leila now took off her clothes and she asked Matthias to never let her go, and he said he won't.

Matthias thought Leila was hopeless in swimming. She kept screaming and screaming. When they got out the lake, he was staring at her naked body coolly but without a hint of lust and Leila got embarrassed so she was searching for her clothes, but noticed they were replaced by gowns, and Matthias helped tie her gown's knot and kissed her.

Dinner was prepared and she noticed how every food was already on the table, meaning Matthias didn't want servants to disturb them. Matthias had fun watching Leila eat rather than eat himself. She asked if he could also teach Felix how to swim when he gets older and he agreed, she suddenly asked if Felix also had to be taught how to hunt and he said it was required, but he wont be opening the hunting grounds here so she asked why, and he said it's because he knows the heart of birds.

They make love as Matthias kissed her and bit her collarbones. He threw off his jacket and unbuckled his belt as Leila shook every time he moved. Deep grunts and cries could be heard. Afterwards, Matthias was still kissing her collarbones and her face and Leila noticed how he always looked unfazed and was still neat after everything they did.

Leila was having tea with the duke's grandmother and mom, they complemented her scores on college, because it suited her to be a duchess in college rather than the social circle. They advice her on why doesn't she try to make another child. Leila got flustered and said she does want more, but Matthias doesn't, but they convinced her saying that she's the one giving birth.

That night, Leila knocked at the duke's room. They were still in Arbis so they had adjoined but separate rooms. There was no answer but she opened it anyway. Matthias was sitting while facing the desk, and she asked why he didn't answer. He said she didn't need to knock, but she said it was etiquette. Then she recalled how Matthias never knocked when he went to her room. She asked Matthias if she can be greedy to her heart's content, and he said anything was fine and leaned against the windowsill, telling her to continue. She approached him and she asked for a baby. Matthias was surprised, and said he didn't mind having any number of kids but Leila might have different expectations of him. Of course he loved Felix, but that love grew because of what was happening during the time he was in Leila's belly. In the end, he couldn't resist Leila's pleas so he agreed. They were in bed and Matthias said wasn't she taking advantage of his body and Leila agreed. He said he will only obey her and they make love that night. Matthias left red marks on her body and Leila kissed the scars on his body, recalling how she did it the first time he returned from the war. Matthias pushed deeper inside her and as they fell asleep, he kissed Leila and hugged her tightly. He recalled how he was greedy watching a pregnant Leila back during the war, and how he suddenly got crazy and didn't mind sacrificing the baby to save her, but seeing Leila be eager for his child erased his self-doubts. Leila woke up and Matthias was already on top as they made love again, Leila's body rocked as Matthias grabbed her waist and pushed into her, as he continues to tell her "I love you." my Leila, over and over again

Matthias was getting busy as now he was going to be gone for a business trip, and when Leila asks for how long, he replied that it was a week; to which his servant knew a week was impossible but because of what Matthias said, the schedule was going to be packed to make that possible.

Kyle and Matthias saw each other across the street, and they both gave courtesies; but that was it. Even when Kyle was focusing on his studies, news about the duke and duchess were spreading, and sometimes people even provoked him as he was Leila's ex-fiancé. He was also aware how the nobles could no longer outright insult Leila because the duke would destroy them. Anyone who heard about him would know the man was crazy about his wife. Kyle doesn't think the duke has changed, he doesn't even believe that Matthias is a good person, but he knows, he can be a good husband.

Kyle recalled when they were kids and how Leila didn't have books or materials for school, it hurt his heart so he shared his. Leila gave him something in return so he thought she didn't want to owe him a debt, but he realized it was her way of showing gratitude. Leila gave him colorful pebbles, bird feathers, wild fruits and weird objects and because of that, he got to spend time with her. He isn't heartbroken anymore by what has happened, as the memories he shared with Leila still remain that allowed him to grow into a better person. He was thankful to Leila, who was his sister, his bestfriend and the person he loved. (author let me have him )

Leila was informed by the nanny that the duke will be arriving home soon, and she was surprised because she usually spent time talking to him on the phone but he never mentioned it. She carried Felix and waited for him on the grounds, the duke was in the car and got out when he saw them. He carried Felix who was running to him, calling him daddy, while Leila said she missed him and asked what about him. Even though she knew his answer, she wanted to be greedy. The duke responded by kissing her and Leila thought it was unfair. Felix kept calling him while they were kissing, so Felix cried and Matthias frowned a bit. He also kissed Felix on the cheeks.

Leila was lying in the sofa and the nanny noticed she hasn't been eating much, and kept sleeping. They had a hunch and they called the doctor, Leila was pregnant!.

When Leila told Matthias, he had to act surprised.. it was found out Matthias also called the doctor saying he thinks his wife is pregnant and the doctor replied that Leila said she wanted to surprise him, he told the doctor not to worry about that, and he waited for Leila to tell him.

Matthias told doctor to take care of Leila, as he recalled how pregnancy like was for hard her during the war, as she suffered a lot. (it was mostly because of u dimwit ) Leila woke up from her sleep to see Matthias asking if she has morning sickness, and noticed she's been eating peach lately.

Leila was sulking as the duke was telling her off about her meals because she needed to eat more. Her pregnancy also became widespread, especially when she was going to college with a full belly. Leila was lying in bed resting, and Matthias wiped her body with the hot towel gently. They hugged and it was common for their legs to get tangled. Leila said she might become a penguin after a few more weeks, so it'd be hard to get pretty. She was going to ask if he could still tell her she was pretty but before she could, he already said "I will, I'll do it anyway Leila."

"Matthy now hurry, can you feel it" (She now called him Matthy after their wedding day btw haha). Leila was proud every time the baby moved, as she quickly took his hand and placed it on her belly.

A baby girl with blonde hair was born, Matthias was about to go to Leila's hospital room, but stopped because he got afraid that what if all of this love was an illusion- but Leila's voice called him and that made him snap out of it. (ok this made me sad)

They named the girl Leah and she looked exactly like Matthias apart from the blonde hair. The grandma just laughed and said she should hope the third one would look like her, she asked if Leila's seen the family portraits and said the bloodline is pretty strong so the fact Leila added a blonde to the family line was victorious.

Uncle Bill's tomb which was near the border of the enemy country was transferred to Arbis- Matthias made it happen. Leila asked from the duke's grandmother and mother as well if she could make the cottage into a lab. They agreed but asked why she needed their permission since it was hers, but Leila said it was because they were managing Arbis. They talked about college, and also encouraged Leila to become a professor. Leila planted roses over uncle Bill's tomb and Leila told her children they should visit grandfather.

Leah and Felix were playing near the roses when Matthias appeared. He finished earlier than expected from his luncheon and the kids ran to him while Leila slowly followed making sure they wouldn't trip. He kissed both his children on the cheek. The scene of his wife and two kids made his eyes deepen. He thought he wanted a daughter that looked like Leila, but a different desire would come at night when he watched Leila fall asleep in his arms. He thought may the only woman he like was Leila, and may there be only one man in the world for her, forever. "I'm still crazy." The moment of kissing her forehead, soft lips, cheeks and his nose that gently touched her curled hair; there was a laughter mixed with a sweet self-help. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't be a perfect husband. His twisted love may continue until the end of his life. It was nice though, if Leila could be his Leila forever. He held Leila in his arms, and they exchanged kisses contained with laughter that were intimate and warm. He wanted Leila's love like this. "May you be comfortable and warm enough to be able to forget your difficult and lonely childhood and heal your wounds." He knew what he felt was the same love, but in a different way. He thought it didn't matter if he loved Leila more. "Love also has light and shadow, so if a shadow cast on the side of love more, Mathias would be willing to stand on that side. Because his happiness is in Leila’s light." They walked hand in hand. "Leila" She turned around and gave a smile, it was a beautiful afternoon where the eternal summer forest sparkled.

THE END

I might re-read this again this year, so I might come back here to re-edit or add more to the Moments. Everything I've written is based from the story, but written from how I perceived it. Come back on 2022 if you want to see the re-edited Moments, and I hope yall enjoyed reading about Leila and Matthy, I'm curious about your thoughts too.

I think one of the things that had drawn and made me so emotional to this story was the way it was written. It was written in an omniscient: third person point-of-view. IMO, that's one of the simplest ways to clearly read a story, as you have knowledge to everything about the characters from their thoughts, to what made them sad, to their memories, etc.. The writing fitted so much because if it was written in another point-of-view, I wouldn't have been this obsessed with Matthias because his actions, thoughts and desires for Leila wouldn't have been written so much and I would have been left trying to make my own assumptions and give him the benefit of the doubt. Reading this also felt like you were in their world, because of the passage of time and how scenarios where shown throughout the seasons. It was also refreshing to know about their timeline, as most Korean novels I read exist within centuries where no cars and telephones existed. When reading this, I always imagine it like the Taisho era; there were still nobility and social classes but commoners had more rights and could take more professions than before. The characters weren't one-dimensional as you'd expect even when as storyline focused more on the couple. I never hated Claudine as she was also raised and pressured with the responsibilities expected of her as a noble woman from their time, so her pride was reasonable. Even the duke's grandmother was fun to read about, though uptight and not open for change, she is only trying to protect her family. They all had their own struggles and desires. If there's one thing I don't like about the story, it is how the author did Kyle dirty. Even if he was the second male lead, this angel's love for Leila was so pure and healthy and the author shouldn't have kept making him re-appear again and again in Leila's life only to be rejected and broken. I find it unnecessary to also state that I didn't like the story because of Matthias. He's the main lead, you didn't have to like him, make excuses for him or understand him, but if you're only going to rant about him and say Leila should've chosen Kyle, no need to continue reading this. You know the duke's the end goal, if you can't take that, then there are perfectly healthier and more considerate male lead's out there that you were hoping to find. It's fine to rant and have your opinions about the male lead, but the tags on this novel already curve to the darker side, so it really makes no sense when you're still looking for healthier and kinder male leads??? I like Matthias in the perspective of fantasy, as possessive and crazy men are my ideal. But I'm rational enough to know that I'd better call the police if this happens to me in real life. I also don't justify Matthias myself even in the storyline, because his personality doesn't stem from a lack of affection or a horrible and traumatic past- it stems from him in general. He was born like this already, as he had a desire for perfection with his title as the duke. Meeting Leila, he wasn't prepared to handle the one invariable that appeared in his perfect world. He was attracted to her from the start, because unlike the others who praised him as the duke, Leila looked scared and avoided him. It was the first time someone showed him real emotions rather than their admiration and fake personalities seeing only his name and the power that came with it. He desired her and when he had her, he thought he would be satisfied. But he couldn't understand why he wanted more than just her body, and he still couldn't realize he was in love because the feelings of love were unfamiliar to him. He liked to see her cry because Leila never laughed at him or showed him any other emotion, so he made use of the only reaction he could get out of Leila. Like the cover and the metaphors enclosed in the story, the symbolism of the bird was a big thing. Eventually, it wasn't a cage he gave Leila, but a sky where she could roam freely with his love. They're now married and he still hasn't changed all the way, he'll forever be this crazy and possessive towards her, the only difference is Leila loves him back so they can now practice being in a healthy relationship lol. As for Leila, I can't help but think she's really a Mary Sue. And pretty much masochistic. But I do like her, I admired how she never lost no matter what the world gave her. The lonely child just wanted to be love. Now, she has a man who would move the mountains for her. It's a love to make-up for her lonely life honestly. Guess she didn't like Kyle because the duke was more handsome? Haha kidding, in my opinion she chose him over Kyle because although Kyle did love her, he never acted strongly on it and overwhelmingly showed how much he wanted her. Unlike Matthias, who expressed it so shamelessly no matter how crazy it seemed. Overall, I like to read this on days you want to feel some angst and dive into the world of yandere. This story brought me a lot of sadness, but I have enjoyed it and will continue to relive this in my fantasies hehe.

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Thank you really i really love this
Did you have another side story about them, can't get enough
I'm not satisfy yet i hope there'll be side story lol
Re read this again and still not getting bored
Yandere ml gimme spicy vibe lmao

kokolei · Sep 27, 2021

dinocreature said: ↑

hey, guys! anyone who knows where i can read the whole story? i’m gonna cry just reading the spoilers. badly want to read it ☹︎ ♡
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I have the novel in raw form, if you want that, let me know, would have to email it to you.

ToruLata · Sep 27, 2021

SakuraHana said: ↑

50 Shades of Gray, but in Korean. Lmao
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Soooo accurate hahahaha

Nilfiem · Oct 1, 2021

Marcie said: ↑

Revised Edition

There was a fire accident in the estate's garden because of the new generator. Uncle Bill was was at fault because he wasn't familiar with new technology. He gets arrested and Leila's only hope is for the duke to pardon him. That night, the duke knew Leila would come because they made eye contact when uncle Bill was getting taken by the police. Leila did, and she asked him to forgive uncle Bill. Of course, the duke doesn't listen to her request because he said why would he, he would have more losses than gains if he'll do that, as even his grandmother was injured and sent to the hospital. Leila keeps shedding tears and doesn't know what to do anymore until Matthias offered a deal. She asked him what the deal was, but when she realized how Matthias was staring at her, she kept saying she couldn't do that. He gave her some time to think about it.

Leila left trying to find other options, but the uncle Bill's bail among other things was something they couldn't afford. Matthias knew she would come back, and she did. He knew this wasn't the way to feel the joy he wanted from her. But for now, this was the best to prevent her from leaving. She asked one more time if there was any other way, but there obviously wasn't so she finally agreed and sat down on the floor.

During their first night, not everything was in detail but the duke started by kissing Leila and taking off her clothes. His tongue was forceful, he pulled of her garter and underwear and threw it on the floor as he was between her knees. He admired his pretty creation. Leila just spilled tears, as this night was so painful for her. Matthias got awakened when Leila said something. He was still enjoying the aftertaste of pleasure, and was still buried inside her. Leila said he must keep his promise, so Matthias nodded pretending he couldn't win. Then he slept with her again. The traces of everything that conspired where evident from Leila, who had blood, bruises and marks all over her body. The duke really enjoyed it and was like a beast.

The next day, uncle Bill was released and kept thanking the duke for what happened, the duke just smiled at uncle Bill while exchanging glances with a tense Leila. Claudine talks to Matthias and tells her how she is wary because she wouldn't want uncle Bill to be here because of the accident. Matthias dismisses her off and so Claudine has a clue that he must have done that because of Leila.

When night came, the duke was expecting Leila to come again. Leila doesn't bother to cry anymore because she doesn't want to give him that satisfaction. She didn't want to remember what happened before, where everything was so painful. More details of their first night transpire. Matthias couldn't believe he was pathetic that he was impatient enough to do it on the floor the whole time. He is satisfied with the marks he left on her body, like on her butt and thighs. After that, Leila was on the floor, ignoring him and had her back turned on him. When he tried to approach she froze. It was hard to tell who was being trampled on. He went to take a shower, and came back to see Leila wasn't there anymore.

When Leila came on their second night, she lied in bed and started taking off her clothes immediately. Matthias was asking what she was doing, Leila said she was just doing her job. He got mad. So he went to do exactly what Leila was expecting of him. Doing it with her makes him so excited, and it was a long night again until he leaves the room and Leila leaves as well. The attendant asks him what he should do about the cake he bought for her. He wanted to actually feed Leila and ordered a cake from a famous chef, but seeing Leila act like that made him mad. He told the attendant to just discard it.

On another night, Leila did the same thing by taking off her clothes while heading straight to bed. Matthias was doing paperwork and was ignoring her. Leila said she was just going to leave and he stopped her and had prepared a meal for both of them. He said she was dry. It also hurt him when it was dry. Leila said she didn't care and then he said if she dies her tombstone would say she was the duke's mistress who died here. He gave her enough wine and made out with her, then he tied her wrists to the bedside as he took a bath. He knew she might leave again. He thought he wanted Leila to join in the bath, but he'll save that for some another time because he thinks she's too innocent. Leila kept saying she hated him, and she said she never once hated someone- not even her mom who abandoned her, or the relatives who abused and passed her around. The duke covered her body with a gown and tied both of her hands as she fell asleep in his embrace. He was doing his paperwork beside Leila, When the duke was finished reading, he noticed the gown slowly falling off of Leila. Her body was getting more exposed to the cold. He didn't do anything about it because it made Leila unconsciously go deeper into his embrace. He liked her body temperature and kept kissing her eyelids and calling her name. He thought this desire might last longer than expected, and it wasn't a bad thing. Matthias thought he could give Leila a good life, send her to college, buy her stuff, have her live in his other estates, unlike Kyle who could give her nothing.

Kyle returns and still declares his love for Leila, but Leila said things have changed.

Matthias thought that after his marriage with Claudine, Leila should also no longer be in the estate, he thought he should bring her with him somewhere else. He was frustrated with Leila, because he had so much to give and offer her, if only she accepted it. He knows how stubborn she is and that she would rather bite her tongue than admit she is his woman. He went around the mansion and saw Leila and Claudine having a meal together. Claudine asked Leila to be her maid and lied that her maid was injured. Leila couldn't deny it of course, so she agreed. Claudine actually wanted her to know her place as a mistress but she was still acting good and innocent in front of Leila. She planned to stop Leila from being her maid the day Matthias would return from his trip. But he arrived a day earlier, so he saw what she was doing.

Leila was standing by a corner, with Claudine and Matthias. Claudine invited Kyle and his dad as in the meal as well. Kyle told Leila she wasn't a maid and asked her to go outside with him.

Claudine was looking at Mathias and noticed he looked indifferent. She thought maybe he didn't like Leila as he thought. That Leila would be a quiet mistress. She was having tea with the duke's mother and grandmother when he appeared with the doctor. He told Claudine he knew how important her maid was to her, so he had the doctor inspect her injury. It was only a mild one and everyone was mad at the maid for deceiving Claudine. Claudine said she would forgive her maid. She humiliated deep down, but kept her appearance as everyone watching them assumed he was a duke who only cared about the affairs of his fiancé. Claudine didn't need Leila as her maid anymore.

He already sent Leila a message through Phoebe to come tonight, and he already found her inside the parlor when he entered. Leila was sleeping in the sofa, and didn't even made a fireplace. She awoke while Matthias was trying to set up the fire place because it was cold, and she told him to make it quick because she was sleepy. He slowly took of her clothes. When he took of her gloves, he entangled his hands with hers and they shared their warmth for a while, and then there was a slow kiss. He suddenly stopped and Leila thought that was it, but she realized her she was wet. She knew he knew that. Leila said that this reaction has nothing to do with the mind, that she hated him. Matthias took off his clothes and got on top of her. They did it and Leila couldn't even look away as he was grasping her chin. When tears stained her after, he thought this was the face he wanted to see when he was out of Arvis. The feeling when he saw her with Claudine was unfamiliar, and so he just hugged the sagging body of Leila. It got faster and when Leila made more sounds, he lifted his back more violently. She was so exhausted and couldn't push him away anymore, her legs were placed on his shoulders. They bed was creaking and the duke digs into the deepest part possible. She hugged him without knowing, then he bit her. She found the hot texture coming out of the groin embarrassing. When they were done, he wiped her body clean. He hugged the exhausted Leila and was stroking her body, he even stroked her between her legs. He said they should move to the capital, Leila asked why and he said didn't she want to go to college. He didn't want to see Leila being insulted and treated as a maid. Leila didn't want to, she doesn't want to sell her body for that. He felt insulted and said does she think her body is enough for that when it was like wood. The she retorted why was he doing it. He thought he doesn't even need to send his mistress to college. He said it was just his mercy and grace. Leila tired to get up, but Matthias hugged her. He thought he it was ridiculous to have a mistress that stands up to him, but he took it mildly. He kissed her lips again, but Leila was trying to avoid his face so he went on top of her. Before Leila could sense it, Matthias was already in her. The place he wiped became soiled again. Leila was thinking mercy and grace, so she said that was a lie. Matthias knew it was. Even he didn't know what the truth was.

Claudine remembered back when Leila's tuition money was stolen. She was by the garden near the lake, when she saw Matthias talking to a suspicious man. When the police were inquiring about it during the investigation, Matthias denied seeing anyone suspicious. Claudine thought why would he lie. If he did, his only reason was because he wanted to ruin Leila and Kyle's engagement. Claudine and Riel were talking about Matthias and Leila, and Riel assured Claudine that no matter how much crazy the duke was with Leila, it's impossible for Leila to have the duchess seat. They thought they must do something before Matthias realizes that his feeling toward the girl is love. Riel assured Claudine that with the duke never experiencing love or attachment to anyone, not even his own mother; he would never recognize that what he is feeling towards Leila.

The crown prince was at estate for about 5 days, so things have been busy. There was a party in the mansion, and the duke kept glancing at the window where Leila was leaving from. He thought about their first night. How they were on the floor and how he went so crazy. He thought it had been a while since he heard her cries, and he wanted as soon as possible to make Leila tremble, cry for him, and struggle as he buried himself inside her. He wished time would stop there. His thoughts are interrupted because of the people he was conversing with, but still he couldn't stop thinking about Leila. He called her his beautiful little bird, and when he glanced in her direction again, she wasn't there. He knew she wouldn't dare to leave now, because of uncle Bill but he suddenly panicked and thought what if she did. Later when he checked again, he saw she still she wasn't there.

He found Leila when he glanced at the window and felt relieved. He went back to the party and noticed how Claudine was good at being the hostess. He thought Claudine was a worthy opponent, and he knew how this was a perfect marriage that would bring greater power to the family name, not something done for mere feelings. But something felt strange, he didn't know what it was.

Even when the crown prince left, Matthias had to go to Ratz for a few days. Leila thought her days were peaceful because of this. Matthias was finishing things at a quick pace than his schedule intended, even his attendant noticed that. Matthias ordered him to bring a car to fetch Leila. The servant arrived at the hut but Leila didn't want to go until the servant handed her a letter. The letter contained the duke asking her if she was worried about uncle Bill, so Leila went with the servant. When she met the duke, she asked him why he had to blackmail her. He feigned innocence and said it was an advice, since he figured she wouldn't come. He said he would wake after two hours, there was a meal for Leila. More than two hours passed and she didn't want to wake him, she didn't want to eat but her stomach was growling. She decided to eat the cake, Matthias woke up and kissed Leila. All his irritation disappeared, from pushing ahead of his schedule to see her, when he saw Leila ate her favorite food he had the maid bring in. He didn't have a plan in mind, he just wanted to eat and drink and walk together. He thought how he brought a mistress during a business trip. He still kissed her. Leila said to just do it like normal. He bit her red ears. Before she lost consciousness, the last thing she heard was her name through the sound of bumping flesh.

Leila couldn't really escape after it was over, every time she moved he moved to hug her tightly. Meanwhile, Claudine asked her maid to fetch Leila, but of course Leila wasn't at the hut. The maid waited some time but came back saying Leila still wasn't there. Claudine finally admitted that her fiancé was insane about Leila. She was mad because she needed Matthias to be her husband. All her life, she was brought up in preparation as the duchess. Claudine needed to make Leila disappear, so she thought the way to do that was through Kyle.

When Leila and Matthias woke up the next morning, he was ready to do it with Leila so Leila said she was hungry. She repeated it again and Matthias kept laughing out loud. Leila thought he was going crazy. Even after breakfast ended, he smiled seeing Leila eat small bites. After that, Leila read the newspaper and Matthias approached to see why she was so invested. He saw it was the part of the mystery novel section, a page he never read. He laughed again after realizing she liked this kind of thing. They went out and Leila was starting to wonder where they were going, but he didn't answer and just brought her to a store without minding the customers and employees who turned their heads towards them.

Meanwhile, Claudine invited Kyle out to tell her that the reason Leila changed is because she has another man, and that it's the duke.

The store was surprised and thought this usually wasn't a place to bring a mistress. Matthias bought her new shoes and even bended on one knee to put the shoes for her and Leila realized she was receiving more than what their contract stated. Those around them could see the man was crazy for the woman. They later went to eat at a café and Matthias didn't like how she wasn't talkative unlike when he saw her with other people. He asked her about what kinds of birds passed by them on the other side of the window. He also asked her favorite bird so Leila also asked his. Matthias said it was a canary bird. Leila said she was surprised that it wasn't a big bird, and the duke said it was because it was the most beautiful bird. Another bird passed by them so Leila said that was a dove, Matthias replied that he knows that, Leila got flustered and just kept muttering to her tea cup and Matthias laughed. Leila thought it was really an unusual day.

Their hands were entangled and Leila made him promise that uncle Bill will never know about this. He got upset, he said they'll always be together but she denied it. The duke thought of Kyle and how Leila had always given Kyle the smile he himself never once received, but now Leila was his woman.

Claudine was having a meal with Matthias (and someone else, I think it was the duke's mom or her mom). They talked about Leila and Kyle's relationship and Claudine was checking to see if Matthias was interested in the topic. His face remained disinterested, and he excused himself. He thought he knew better than anyone about Leila now. He found himself afterwards in front of Leila's hut. Leila spotted him as she was approaching the hut, and he was displeased that Leila was still wearing her old clothes and shoes and none of what he bought her. Leila didn't want him to go inside and kept telling him to please go but the duke didn't listen. The memories of that sweet day were his own delusion. He dared to regard this woman as something, but she was the one who treated him like nothing. He was the person who yearned for this woman, maybe since the beginning.

Leila wanted to stab and scratch him with her words again. That day she spent with him, reminded her of a strange feeling and she felt repulsed. Matthias told her to shut up, and his voice was low. He hugged her and threw her to table. They sound of kissed could be hear. Kyle approached the hut and saw it wasn't locked. As he went inside, he saw a man on the table with Leila under half-dressed.

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Thank you so muchhh

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