Corrupt a Wish

Granted, you now own Atlantis

I wish for prosperity

 

Granted. You are the most prosperous person in a poor neighborhood.

I wish for a good night's sleep

 

Granted, youu are now plagued with insomnia.
I wish to be glib tongued

 

I have cut off the tongue off the glibbest politician and gifted it to you.
I wish for a new pillow

 

Granted, it is stuffed with cockroach eggs instead of cotton (They are all dead dw)
I wish to eat sashimi on a weekly basis

 

Granted. They all have parasite.
I wish for a dog walker.

 

Granted, you get a guest of unknown origin that skin dogs alive and take their form, mimicking them and acting like a harmless fellow until night falls and would eat you when you least expect it.

I wish for more free time

 

Granted, you got an extra second added to your life for free

I wish for cooler weather

 

Granted. It's now the new Ice Age.
I wish for more decent iced coffee

 

Granted, [Breaking news: coffee around the world is seeing a 1000% increase in price and quality]

I wish for a simple cookie

 

Granted, for an exuberant price

I wish for a time machine

 

Granted, you are now the proud owner of the most advanced broken clock

I with to pay the piano better

 

Granted but everyone is now deaf.

I wish for endless supply of buttercream frosting.

 

Granted, everything you touch will now turn into butter-cream frosting

I wish for a cat

 

Granted, but it runs away from you never to be found again
I wish to go two months back in time

 

Granted, you went back in time, but unfortunately, the place you appeared was still a pitfall 2 months ago

I wish for a X-Ray goggles

 

Granted, they cost you a fortune and are not available for delivery in your country buy you don't find out until you already pay the amount
I wish for a can of pizza and bbq flavoured pringle to arrive in my room right now

 

Granted, it arrived damaged and empty

I wish 10,000 bucks

 

Granted, but it's all in Zimbabwe currency.

I wish for a peace of mind.

 

Granted, it is the peace before war
I wish for a genie who will wash my dishes until the end of time